The Ben & Ashley Incident
In conjunction with a National Day holiday, we decided to hit a karaoke joint for some vocal exercise.
On the day itself, the plan was thwarted because Pekkie was exhausted from chasing chikens all night and refused to leave the bed.
Thus, the Bald Monk, the Auditor, the Banker and me collectively decided over lunch to catch a movie that was starting within the hour. (It was The Expendables) Deciding to travel in two cars, we would meet up at the cinema. With me and the Banker in one car, we headed towards Tropicana Mall's cinema. Traffic was abysmal at best. Surprisingly, while we were stuck in traffic, the Auditor called us and said he was already at the cinema, buying tickets and that he movie was starting soon. Seeing no quick way of us escaping the quagmire of cars, the Auditor left our tickets at the usher's booth and started the movie together with the Bald Monk.
By the time we arrived at Tropicana Mall, it was 30 minutes since the movie started. Dashing to the usher's booth, we asked for our tickets which the usher promptly handed over. On the tickets, one had the name "BEN" and the other had the name "ASHLEY" written on em. In my haste, i dismissed it as the Auditor being as an ass.
Ass
We ran to cinema hall 3, burst through the doors and began looking for our seats. It did not occur to me why the Banker stood motionless looking at the screen instead of scampering for a seat, until i myself took to seeing what caught his eye. We were to watch "The Expendables" - a testosterone fest of muscle, gore, guns and balding men. The screen was showing questionably aligned men, wearing even more questionable clothes dancing to music with a beat. DANCING!
THAT CLEARLY IS NOT THE EXPENDABLES.
We rushed out of the hall, checked our "Ben & Ashley" tickets, which had the words: "Step Up 3D" printed on them. The Auditor wasn't being an ass after all. A dash back to the usher's booth revealed that those 2 were the only tickets left there, and the Auditor was insistent that he did.
We then decided, screw this, we're going in without a ticket!
A call to the Auditor to find out which movie hall it was in (Hall 14), we stormed through the doors, and bright lights greeted our eyes. Bright yellow lights and a small problem of a blank screen with rows and rows of empty seats. Another frantic phone call resulted in the same insistence that Hall 14 was the right place, and the Auditor decided to send the Bald Monk out to bring us into the movie. Sounds logical. Thus, me and the Banker waiting at the foyer for the Bald Monk to put an end to this confusion. And in a few minutes, boy was i wrong.
*phone rings*
Bald Monk:
We you guys at?
Me:
Erm.. we're outside at the foyer waiting for you.
Bald Monk:
I AM at the foyer, and i see nobody. Literally an empty foyer.
Me:
Baldy, stop screwing around. We are standing right here. How on earth can you not see us? Hell, we're not even hiding!
Bald Monk:
But i don't see you guys! I ain't screwing around! ..
Wait..
Which cinema/mall are you guys at?
Me:
Tropicana Mall cinema, of course.
Bald Monk:
(and the last sound you want to hear from that reply)
Oh... *trails off*
..
..
We're at Summit Mall cinema.
In conjunction with a National Day holiday, we decided to hit a karaoke joint for some vocal exercise.
On the day itself, the plan was thwarted because Pekkie was exhausted from chasing chikens all night and refused to leave the bed.
Thus, the Bald Monk, the Auditor, the Banker and me collectively decided over lunch to catch a movie that was starting within the hour. (It was The Expendables) Deciding to travel in two cars, we would meet up at the cinema. With me and the Banker in one car, we headed towards Tropicana Mall's cinema. Traffic was abysmal at best. Surprisingly, while we were stuck in traffic, the Auditor called us and said he was already at the cinema, buying tickets and that he movie was starting soon. Seeing no quick way of us escaping the quagmire of cars, the Auditor left our tickets at the usher's booth and started the movie together with the Bald Monk.
By the time we arrived at Tropicana Mall, it was 30 minutes since the movie started. Dashing to the usher's booth, we asked for our tickets which the usher promptly handed over. On the tickets, one had the name "BEN" and the other had the name "ASHLEY" written on em. In my haste, i dismissed it as the Auditor being as an ass.
Ass
We ran to cinema hall 3, burst through the doors and began looking for our seats. It did not occur to me why the Banker stood motionless looking at the screen instead of scampering for a seat, until i myself took to seeing what caught his eye. We were to watch "The Expendables" - a testosterone fest of muscle, gore, guns and balding men. The screen was showing questionably aligned men, wearing even more questionable clothes dancing to music with a beat. DANCING!
THAT CLEARLY IS NOT THE EXPENDABLES.
We rushed out of the hall, checked our "Ben & Ashley" tickets, which had the words: "Step Up 3D" printed on them. The Auditor wasn't being an ass after all. A dash back to the usher's booth revealed that those 2 were the only tickets left there, and the Auditor was insistent that he did.
We then decided, screw this, we're going in without a ticket!
A call to the Auditor to find out which movie hall it was in (Hall 14), we stormed through the doors, and bright lights greeted our eyes. Bright yellow lights and a small problem of a blank screen with rows and rows of empty seats. Another frantic phone call resulted in the same insistence that Hall 14 was the right place, and the Auditor decided to send the Bald Monk out to bring us into the movie. Sounds logical. Thus, me and the Banker waiting at the foyer for the Bald Monk to put an end to this confusion. And in a few minutes, boy was i wrong.
*phone rings*
Bald Monk:
We you guys at?
Me:
Erm.. we're outside at the foyer waiting for you.
Bald Monk:
I AM at the foyer, and i see nobody. Literally an empty foyer.
Me:
Baldy, stop screwing around. We are standing right here. How on earth can you not see us? Hell, we're not even hiding!
Bald Monk:
But i don't see you guys! I ain't screwing around! ..
Wait..
Which cinema/mall are you guys at?
Me:
Tropicana Mall cinema, of course.
Bald Monk:
(and the last sound you want to hear from that reply)
Oh... *trails off*
..
..
We're at Summit Mall cinema.
Naturally the reply to that revelation is far too explicit and vulgar to be re-typed, so we'll just skip ahead to rushing-out-from-one-mall-and-driving-through-horrible-traffic-to-the-other-mall where we finally got the right tickets and watched the right movie at the right cinema.
One hour-ish after the movie started.
We never found out who Ben & Ashley really was. But we're sorry we took your tickets to a bad movie.
The Auditor is still an ass.
-end-
One hour-ish after the movie started.
We never found out who Ben & Ashley really was. But we're sorry we took your tickets to a bad movie.
The Auditor is still an ass.
-end-
No comments:
Post a Comment